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Social Issues. Tweet about this Share this on Facebook. Whiteness, much like gender, is a performance. My experience of the dating scene here in the UK as a brown man from the subcontinent has mostly been negative, and I think my lack of performative whiteness is the problem. There have been several instances when my politeness was mistaken for an unwarranted advance.
Yet, there I was, feet dipped in clear water, staring into the horizon, trying to convince two middle-aged women whom I did not know that the man I.
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Yet, there I was, feet dipped in clear water, staring into the horizon, trying to convince two middle-aged women whom I did not know that the man I was with was indeed my husband. By the fourth day of our vacation on the islands, we had got used to being stared at. She then asked me questions about our wedding and everything that had led to it.
Then the other woman, who had remained silent until then, asked me for proof. Where are your bangles? Why did I do that? I later kicked myself for having misunderstood their questions as friendly banter.
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I was a few weeks into my freshman year at Duke when my sister, a senior at the time, said to me, “Indian girls who date black guys are sluts.
This is not because I am some kind of self-hating racist. I am very proud to be a British Indian woman. Nor is it that I am not attracted to Indian men. My reluctance to settle down with an Indian guy is more about the message it sends out. While older generations might reach straight for the smelling salts, younger generations often have more complex reactions to interracial couples. I regularly write feminist articles, and have published two comic novels — Virgin and Not at Easy — all about young women exploring their sexuality and, shock horror, their vaginas.
It might not be easy.